Category Archives: Relationships

How To Fix You?

As we journey through life events can throw curves that we did not anticipate.  But most of us do the best we can. In a relationship, struggles can be compounded as you “no longer have to deal with struggles of your own but you are also burdened with the struggles of your partner.

The relationship may seem to begin with rosy outlook, but quickly you learn that it goes through its peaks and valleys.  Then suddenly you may be handed with a crisis that may create havoc in life so much so there is no more “your” life.  You are often left to wonder if there is any more hope left for the future.

It is essential that at this stage you learn to focus on important things.  Do not ponder on what future may look like but focus day to day.

No More Expectations

You are likely to live life with full of expectations- not only for you, but for your family, for your partner.  Tough as it may be, you need to let go of expectations.  What you will notice in the process that you have let go of the pain and anger.  When you let go of the pain and anger, you allow love in.

Make Time For YOU

Sounds so simple, but you are likely to forget YOU as you are too busy being a partner, being a parent, being employee.  Your most likely defense will be, “I do not have time.”  Well, you will need to find to focus on you.  You need to find time to allow yourself the space to attain nirvana- state of feeling balanced.

Laugh a Little (Lot)!

In time of crisis, nothing seems to go right, who can laugh, you say.  True indeed, laughter may not make crisis disappear, but it provides needed relief.  It is often said that laughter is the best medicine.  Even when succumbed to despair, a simple laughter eases the pain and inner soul finds relief.  Sometimes all you can do is learn to laugh at yourself.  There are funny moments in every day.  Find them and laugh a little.

Do Not Let Struggle Define You

It is so easy to be defined by the struggles you face.  You may be experiencing the struggles, but they are not you.  You are not a victim.  Your struggles are temporary phase to strengthen you.  Overcoming the struggles will turn out to be unique experiences to make you into even better person.

Yes, circle of your life comprises of many people who are precious to you.  But they have their own journey in their life.  Your struggles are yours, just as their struggles are theirs.  You are willing to lend helping hands but not at your expense.  Despite all the closeness you may feel, You only have You!


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Dance Bringing People Together

When you look at the news now days, you can’t help believe that we are all divided. Yes, indeed we all have our own points of views. We have formulated our perceptions based on our experiences. Indeed, that is what makes us part of human race. Through the differences, we can learn from each other. Setting the differences aside, there is universal bonding though music and dance.

Matt Bray took on a huge project to prove that dance can indeed bring everyone together. Man Travels the World to show strangers 1 dance and puts It All Together for spectacular video.

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Matt loaded up his car and embarked on a 10,000-mile road trip. He created a YouTube channel called ProjectOneLife and in two months’ time, met 100 people who learned a dance routine Matt choreographed to the song “Gone” by JR JR. Matt traveled from city to city and places in-between that included rural settings, music festivals and other spots. That meant the backdrops behind these people’s dance routines varied, which only added to the final product.

After all of the dancers were videotaped performing the routine, Matt then spliced everyone’s moves together into one big compilation. Some of the dancers’ moves will blow you away and the grins on their faces are priceless. It’s amazing to see that in a world where sadness and ill will abounds, complete strangers were willing to dance with Matt and be recorded doing it for all the world to see. You have to watch this video. Your spirits will instantly be lifted after you view it!

Turn Around Your Life

This video was beyond incredible. It gave me love for the song and it was just amazing to watch and had such a warm feeling to it. Also the dance was weirdly hypnotic. Matt has lifted the spirits of millions of viewers.

Yes, after all is said and done, there is goodness in all of us. The humanity shines through the music and rhythm to dance to.

Lyrics for Gone

I’ve made up my mind over and over
Keep pressing rewind but I’m getting older
Tried every door, don’t know who I’m looking for
And I’ve made up my mind over and over
I can’t be everything you want me to be
I can’t be everything you want me to be
Finally, I can see the light through the leaves
But it’s all gone
But it’s all gone
What comes from the ground now is returning
It’s all the same sound and my ears are burning
In some strange home, don’t know who I’m working for
I’ve made up my mind over and over
I can’t be everything you want me to be
I can’t be everything you want me to be
Finally, I…

How Not To Be Victim Of Cheating In Relationship?

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Sometimes just loving may not be enough to hold your partner. You may be wondering if there is a way to prevent your partner cheating on you.

Unfortunately, there isn’t anything you can do to ensure your partner will not cheat on you. But if you constantly worry about being cheated, that is likely to drive your partner away from you. Your constant fear may lead your partner to think you do not trust your partner. Trust is positively strong element in relationship. There is nothing more toxic that not trusting your partner.

Learn How To Be Desired

It is possible that in your previous relationship, you may have been a victim of cheating. But not all relationships encounter cheating. It is essential that analyze your earlier relationships to ensure that you are selective in selecting your partner. You can seek help of therapists or read books for healing and learning to trust again.

The brutal reality is that you have to accept that you could get cheated again. And should that happen, it is best not to blame yourself. Surely, it will not be pleasant but you know you will survive. In time, you will learn to love again. In time, heart heals.

Learn How To Be Desired

There are ways to bolster your emotional and physical connection so your partner will want to stay with you. The simple essence of relationship is being connected to each other. The connection can only be enhanced when there is intimacy. The simple basic approach is to desire and to be desired by each partner.

The best way to enhance relationship is to communicate via Language of Lust and Language of Desire. These methods provide ways for awesomely intimate relationship only to enhance emotional bonding.

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Never again have communication issues when you master Language of Lust and Language of Desire. 

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Language of Lust To Trigger Her Hot Buttons

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Perhaps you are envisioning a beautiful playmate’s body dancing through your imagination, right!

But seriously, to be able to trigger woman’s hot button has nothing to do with her body but her mind. To be able to get to her body, you must be able to tickle her mind.

Make Her Crave For You

What needs to be understood is that sex is all about entanglement with the body, but actual passion begins in her mind. It is the language of lust unlocks her sexual imagination. Enhance her sexual imagination to enjoy her physical intimacy.

The common mistake men make is that they think it is all about their performance. Not at all. It is your language of lust that will make her think of you as the best she ever had.
If you want to be her sexual super hero, you will need to super charge her emotions. You need to make her feel sexually irresistible and you need to adore her.

There is unique technique known as mastering language of lust. The technique begins with what you say and how you make her feel. You need to understand that as a man you are all about being physical, but to your woman it is about emotions. Stir her emotions with passionate lingo and she is yours to have and hold.

Make Her Crave For You

Women are aware that her value is based on her appearance. But in essence her sexuality is what makes her woman that she is. She may be sexually confidant woman but she fears about how she shares her body, who she shares with and how she looks sharing it.

For her, encounter with you has one main goal she wants to be your sex goddess. All you have to do is to create that safe place for her to relax and connect through the language of lust so she will be engaged with you in totality.

So what is the language of lust, you ask.

Make Her Crave For You 

There are few specific phrases that captivate woman’s attention and stir her emotions. But note that there has to be sincerity as you deliver these phrases via text or in person. It may be a good idea that initially you start with PG rated phrases.

  • You have me so turned on just thinking of you.
  • Your body is so beautiful, I love exploring every inch.
  • What are you doing to me? I can’t stop thinking about you.
  • Damn, I am one lucky man.
  • You turn me on like no other woman.
  • I love how much pleasure you give me.
  • You feel so amazing, you know that right?
  • I find you completely irresistible.
  • You have me crazy with desire for you.

And these are just a few examples. If you are ready to totally tap into her sexual imagination, be the Sex God of her dreams, and make her addicted to you, check out this quick video. 

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Cuddling Can Make You Happy

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In the modern world of ours we are able to reach everyone but yet we are unable to touch anyone. In the area of intimacy most people are sex obsessed but touch deprived.

Lots of cultural do and don’ts prevent people from touching each other leading to an invisible emotional distance. Touch deprivation has become mantra in our world, with mandates against touching in our school systems even from as early as the preschool stage. People are conditioned to be afraid of touching each other. It is no wonder that people are willing to pay for cuddling.

There are professional cuddling agencies that have sprung up in the US. The company trains and certifies would-be professional cuddlers. There are websites as a virtual marketplace for clients and cuddlers to find each other.

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Supposedly the cuddling service serves as a platonic and—importantly—a therapeutic service. It has set out to fill a perceived void in the emotional realm of modern society, one where sex is easy to find, but not genuine intimacy. Yet there is a fine line whether paid cuddling is “a real thing”, a legitimate, non-sexual service that the current wellness industry fails to provide.

Cuddle is form of touching that is yearned by many. Cuddling is being touched- not just intimacy but a type of intimacy that is undemanding and unconditional. However you may feel about cuddling, cuddling offers real health benefits. Setting aside your and partner’s likes and dislikes, you may want to take a look at cuddling ways.

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Cuddling is form of caring. There are times when total intimate experience is not desired (for whatever reasons); this is when cuddling comes handy. It is intimate and yet desired form by which body exchanges warmth and positive vibes. It is handy during times of fatigue or nights you want to be glued to your television.

Cuddling improves relationship. The cuddling is ultimate form of expression of satisfaction after an intimate encounter. Cuddling increases your sense of security with your partner, which increases your desire to be emotionally intimate.

Cuddling lowers blood pressure. Cuddling is just connecting with your partner. In fact, hugging and cuddling can actually help lower blood pressure. It just may help the heart health of both you and your partner.

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Cuddling is good for immune system. Snuggling up with your partner may actually help you stay healthy. Cuddling gives your immune system a pick-me-up that some believe is just as effective as popping a multivitamin. When cuddled, you are releasing all the feel good hormones.

Cuddling eases stress and promotes healing. As feeling good by cuddling releases stress it can also help increase pain thresholds and promote growth and healing.

Cuddling makes you happy. You will be happy when you’re curled up in your lover’s arms as cuddling releases some pretty key ingredients that’ll help boost your current feel-good status. When cuddled, you release dopamine and serotonin thus elevating your moods.

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Simply put, there are many emotional reasons to cuddle up. Cuddling is a comfortable way to communicate non-verbally. Cuddling makes people feel connected and gives them a sense of understanding. Ultimately ensures that after all you are not alone.

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Are You Relationship Addict Or With Relationship Addict?

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By now you must have heard of the highly publicized romance between superstars Chris Brown and Rihanna. Their on-again-off-again relationship and their public feuds, including his beating and bruising her several years ago have been covered by media extensively. Brown-Rihanna is a couple just like so many other young romantics who, in seeking true love, find only a dramatization of their inner conflicts.

It is only obvious then you need to ask if you are in a relationship because of love or addiction.

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It may be a strange question, but it needs to be asked. Those who are relationship addicts, they often think they are in love, but not really. In their eyes, a healthy, loving relationship is not cool. Surely, the three magic words- I love you- may be uttered by partners, but in reality they are meaningless.

In any relationship, chances are high that honeymoon phase ends and often evolves into healthy phase. But those who are relationship addicts, they long for passion and enthrallment in the relationship continuously. As such, when novelty wears off, they are ready for another venue.

It is hard for relationship addict persons to put in time, effort, and energy to make it work. They are not willing to go the extra mile and stick it out for real love. They rather hop from one partner to the next when things get rough, instead of weathering the storm.

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The pattern of addiction is easily recognizable. The partners will argue and breakup and eventually will reconcile and makeup. This goes on for a long while. This is surely an indication that the relationship full of breakups and makeups is not meant to be. It is possible that either or both partners are relationship addicts.

Just like people who experience other addictions, the person’s life has spun out of control and there is the urge to regain power. The obvious sign of a love and relationship addict is his or her inability to control over romantic fantasies that was experienced at the inception of the relationship. Surely, most people may not be able to control emotions in a given moment, but they know how to react in a controlled manner. The addicts lack the control of their reactions.

In most relationships, most partners want to make each other better. But in some cases, one can easily get caught up with their significant other. If the partner is a relationship addict, the personal drama impacts other areas of life- losing interest in person’s job. Simply put, the addicts are losing sight of their responsibilities. Risky situation, indeed.
Strange as may sound, most people have unrealistic expectation out of their relationship- a perfect love story. But reality is very brutal and far far away from fairy tales. The relationship and love addicts have been sold on fantasy not on actual romance.

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Quiet often relationship addicts equate sex to love. For love and relationship addicts initial passionate can’t-keep-your-hands-off-one-another feeling with actual love. For the addicts that kind of passionate encounters needs to exist all the time. The reality is that there is a difference between lust and love. Simply put, romantic and love addicts lust must go on and on.

It is never too late to look honestly at the value and purpose of relationships. It will be great if you look at it prior to initiating any relationship. What need or value does this relationship serve for you? Are you in it because of the amazing chemistry? Are you in this relationship to avoid being alone? Or would you like a relationship that inspires you to be the best person you can be … or one where you feel safe enough to be vulnerable so you can heal and grow?

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Most people seek a meaningful relationship. Unfortunately, not everyone knows what a meaningful relationship is. In most cases, when it comes to meaningful each one of you may have different concept of “meaningful”. Be aware of relationship or love addicts, as they are likely to be threatened by the fact you sometimes want one thing while your partner wants a different thing.

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It Is Time To Divorce

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In Byrd’s sensational hit, “Turn, Turn, Turn”, there are lines:
A time for love, a time for hate
A time for peace, I swear it’s not too late!

When it comes to applying the song to a relationship, an additional line would have been appropriate, “a time for divorce”.

Yes, unpleasant as it may sound, there is a time for divorce.  No one can definitely say it is the right decision.  You may ponder whether to fight to stay in your marriage or fight to get out of marriage or cut your losses.

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Did you notice that whichever way you decide, you had to fight.  That is the point.  If you have to “fight”, to stay in the marriage, then that itself is not a good sign.  But there are few signs that may have evolved in your relationship that suggest that it is time to divorce.

You are contemplating of being alone.  The feeling of being alone gives you the sense of freedom- If you feel this way often, then it is time for divorce.

You are so not into your partner that the partner’s touch gives you the creeps.  It feels like a thousand ants on your skin.  You feel bad bigly. You are feeling repulsed, only to yell out touch me not. It may not be the reason, but surely a signal in the direction leading to divorce.

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If you have cheated or you have been cheated on, there is surely no turning back.  Yes, there can be case made about forgiving.  As good human being as you may be, forgiving is possible but forgetting is not likely.  When faith is shaken, it is time for divorce.

Deep down you are looking into distant future.  In that distant future, you are happy but ironically it does not include your partner.  When you have that kind of vision too often, it is time for divorce.

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In a marriage, keeping intensity in relationship requires two people.  When there is no desire to fuel the intensity, there is trouble in a matrimonial paradise.  There is apathy and your partner’s action does not faze.  It is time for a divorce.

As the last stanza in the “Turn, Turn, Turn” states, “I swear it’s not too late.”

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Why Woman Becomes Unfaithful?

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Generally it is accepted that men are capable of being unfaithful with simple attraction to another person. However, when a woman is unfaithful her decision is not always made in the heat of moment. She has felt a slow breakdown in her relationship. The sense of ultimate breakdown leads to someone else’s arms.

A woman’s essence of being in a relationship is that she is not only being loved but she is special to her partner. Her partner has to assure her that she is the only one makes him happy. She is thrives when she feels special. Special for being who she really is as a person. But most of all she is in the eyes of the man she loves.

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Simple as a touch from her partner is all she may need. But in time, companionship is taken for granted. In the course of normal routine, not only there are no moments of intimacy but even simple touching each other is non-existent. Woman needs that touch of love on a regular basis. Through her partner’s touch(es) she feels she is desired. In an essence, being desired is the core need of a woman’s mojo.

Most men often hear from their woman that he is not listening to her. But what a woman is saying that her partner is not hearing her. She longs to be heard when she speaks. Yes, it is possible that in reality, her partner is listening to her but what is missing is that he is not empathizing with her. He fails to validate her experiences. Women feel connected when they are heard. Chances are high if she gets a man’s ears, he is likely to get her!

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It is often said that familiarity breeds contempt. As partners get used to each other, they are likely to harp of negative attributes. As stated earlier, woman thrives on being special to her partner, constant criticisms and put-downs create a void. She has lost her self-esteem. She longs to boost her self-esteem even if that means seeking someone else.

It is true that no relationship is perfect but it is also true that relationship needs to be tolerated. The pleasantness is essential. Pleasantness is brought through harmony.

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Harmony is brought through enhancing each other in a relationship. Mind you well, not too difficult. Enhancing comes through- touching, hearing, feeling, reaching out- each other.

Simply, you enhance each other by accepting and appreciating each other.

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5 Essentials To Live Life

Your Life- What Do You Want?

It may sound a simple question, but you will be surprised that many folks have no idea. Of course, there will be many responses to the question – travel to Hawaii, become CEO, win a lottery, etc. But as we are evolving and developing in tech-frenzied and timeless world, we humans stray from universal and timeless wants. If you think about wants they are so simple and yet elusive and impossible to attain.

What one really wants, you ask.

Here’s my take on what’s missing in life and work today. Interestingly, it is possible to attain these even in this tech-frenzied and timeless world of ours.

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There is no better place for freedom (relatively speaking, of course) in the world than the United States. But to be free does not mean you have freedom. Freedom requires you to stand up powerfully for what you want and believe in. By the way, that itself is not enough. You need to pursue what you want and believe with commitment.

Experiencing freedom is willing to be yourself. It starts with having authentic values and beliefs. This is crucial because there will be others to tell you (or force you) what is right for you. You will need to be bold and courageous because in life you will meet challenges and nay-sayers.

Experiencing freedom allows you to fail along the way without regrets but willing to learn from the failures. Yes, freedom is in experiencing success with blend of failures. Sounds easy, but many are scared to muster the courage.

Real freedom is being you, knowing you and respecting you.

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The basic of being you to have freedom means having confidence. Most people have skills and special talents but they are doubtful about their capabilities. It is not necessarily their fault. It is easy to lose self-confidence as we may experience situations that are hurtful and challenging. We are also surrounded by others who are either yelling or tearing us down.

Yes indeed, it is tough world out there. But you are the only one who knows your abilities. Most of all, you ought not to be afraid to fail because the failure will make you even better. It is belief in you that you are willing and ready, eventually to forge ahead to soar.

Think about it, if you can’t have confidence in you, how anyone else can have in confidence in you.

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It is amazing how you are likely to refer to your work when passion is mentioned. But it is your life that you need to be passionate about. Life is not merely existing for a paycheck or doing secure things day after day.

When you are passionate about your life, you will overcome feelings of ineptitude or negativity because of setbacks you may experience. Though it is not that you desire setbacks, but it is acknowledging that any setback is not the end of the world because you still have life ahead for which you have passion for.

It is the core belief that you are here for a purpose. The purpose you will define and/or develop only to be tuned and modified as you pursue your journey in life.

Simply put, living your life, as you define it, is ultimate passion.

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Once you have defined freedom, instilled confidence and realized you passion, you will understand your life priorities to have balance in your life. To attain balance in your life, you ought to know non-negotiables thus you will be living from that knowledge, and making the right decisions that align with your top life priorities.

It is to be noted that balance is NOT stability. Your life needs to have balance because events in occurring in life are likely to dent stability. Events such as loss of a job, death in family, domestic turbulence are likely to shake stability but it is you who needs to have balance.

Your balance comes from your spirit, your know-how, your abilities, enabling you to handle what comes your way.

Simply put, balance is there when you realize that NOTHING outside of you is secure or stable.

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Fulfillment is void of emptiness in life. Sounds profound, but it is not. In the age of constant wants and desires, you are likely feel unsatisfied. Fulfillment is possible when you are honoring your own potential, not forsaking yourself by putting everyone else in front of you. Fulfillment comes when you take bold actions that say “yes” to the future vision of you despite temporary setbacks.

Fulfillment is possible when you are able to effectively separate who you are from what you do. You need to look at your life as a whole and emphasize overall happiness. It is essential to understand that happiness is from within. Most people are in search for happiness outside themselves- in a job, a partner, a family. Yes, some of the exterior situations lead to happiness but your happiness need not be tied to external events or folks.

Simply put, you have attained fulfillment you are not “running on empty”.

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Donald Trump Can Make Sex Great Again

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It seems lately that everything can be attributed to Donald Trump. Then it is plausible that solution to making sex great again may be dependent on Trump.

According to recent study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, people in the USA are having less sex today than they did generations ago. Your sex life is not what it once was. It is suggested that perhaps the economy of the country may be the cause.  (Also check out How Donald Trump Can Make You A Winner)

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The major concern is that married couples – especially with kids at home – are working longer hours and facing more intense financial pressures that may put a damper on their sex lives. The gap is widening between rich and poor and the middle class is practically non-existent. More people have to spend more time working. To stay afloat, people have to take two or three jobs to meet financial obligations, thus leaving no time or energy for sex.

According to the report, Married people typically had sex 73 times a year in 1990, researchers report in the Archives of Sexual Behavior. But by 2014 married couples were having sex just 55 times a year, trailing single people who had sex 59 times a year. To examine shifts in national sex habits, researchers looked at survey data collected from 1972 to 2014 on a nationally representative sample of 56,859 adults.

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In fairness, financial situation may be a major factor, but there is another factor that may be attributing to lack of romantic interlude. The external entertainment is more entertaining and more on-demand entertaining is available. That is to say, there are a lot more things to do at 10 pm at home than there used to be. It is all thanks to smartphones premiering in 2007, Netflix streaming video in 2007 and YouTube in 2006.

In essence, if America is going to be winner again thanks to anticipated economic boom, people can have time for in-demand sex. Perhaps, then we will have lot to thank Donald Trump for.

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